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Friendship Stature

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Post  MagicPickleFairy Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:42 pm

About a month ago, I have deleted a friend of mine from a social networking site due to her making irrelevant, crude comments along with just treating me awfully outside of the internet. I will not dwell on the personal details too much, since they are kind of personal.

Anyways, I have gotten a message asking why I have deleted her. I have ignored to message, but then she kept on calling me, which I also kept on ignoring.

Then I've decided that the next worst thing to giving the reason, is not to give the reason. So I've made a private post on the social networking website on the reasons why I don't want to be her friend anymore, like how she treats me, and her Learning Disabilities excuses for treating me the ways that she does that offend me, since I go to school full of people with such disabilities. Thus far, she has given me two private messages which are walls of text on why my reasons are awful reasons, even if I have typed with the deepness of my heart. Also, I am not a person to insult other people too easily, so it was very difficult to stand up for myself.

I am expecting more messages from her; I can't block her due to blocking her before, and I can't block again for another 48 hours.
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Post  Musashi_HUmar Tue Jul 20, 2010 8:52 pm

Well first of all, I'm glad you stood up for yourself. It must have been very difficult for you, but I'm proud. I know you are mostly a very kind-hearted person. If your friend was being that mean and rude, I think you did the right thing. I know it might be difficult to manage right now, but you'll get through this. I've had difficulties with friends with learning and mental disabilities myself and I know that it isn't easy. There really is no excuse for treating someone bad, though. Even if they do have an issue, they have no excuse to be mean.

Since you've told her your reasons for not wanting to be friends any more, I'm sure she will get the message soon and leave you alone. If she does keep bothering you, just ignore her. You've given her your reasons and she has no excuse to vex you any longer. In the mean time, try not to dwell on it too much. Its not healthy. I would suggest calling up some of your friends that do treat you nicely and maybe hang out with them. I'm sure you could find some fun activity to do with them. But if they're too busy to get together with you, just try having a decent length phone conversation with them. That helps me some times.
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Post  NiGHTS and Sonic Tue Jul 20, 2010 9:07 pm

It's great that you stood up to her, if you didn't it could have gotten worse. It must have been hard for you to go through that. I don't think she was a good friend at all for treating you that way,That happened to me once this girl kept punching me and kept making excuses. So I refused to be her friend. I hope she stops bugging you.
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Post  SiLK Wed Jul 21, 2010 9:49 am

You're doing exactly the right things, and all the posts so far are absolutely right.

You explained how you feel and she doesn't seem to be capable of accepting it.
I would have said to give her a chance if she had apologized and promised to treat you better, but her arguing and insulting your reasons leads me to think that she's just beyond redemption in this case.

Just keep deleting her posts without responding until the 48 hours are up, then block her and don't let her have any further access to you.

Friends are people who make you feel special and happy, and your feelings are almost always right.
So if your gut tells you that she's not a friend, go with it.
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Post  MagicPickleFairy Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:16 am

Thanks guys, I really do feel better about what I told this person. I was just feeling just plain awful about my honesty, since I am not a person who tells cold hard truths, and she didn't make it feel any better for me to actually be truthful. I know that you guys at Dreams for the Fandom are true friends, and I really do take your word for it. Also, I am taking Muashi's advice of getting some nice friends to hang out with me, and I will be seeing some friends tomorrow.
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Post  SiLK Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:39 am

That's great, Pickle. Treat yourself to ice cream or something nice while you're out.
You're entitled when you're having a rough time. Smile
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Post  NiGHTS and Sonic Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:54 am

I'm glad you're feeling better and remember we'll always be here when you're having a rough time! Very Happy
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